Crush Overwhelm in Five Promising Ways for More Success with ADHD

Do you feel like you’re drowning in tasks of daily living? Do brushing your teeth, eating, working, taking care of the kids, self-care, and keeping up with friends or family require superpower efforts?    

You’re not alone. We all experience overwhelm but when you live with ADHD, autism, and related neurodivergent conditions, it’s common to experience overwhelm consistently in your daily life. 

ADHD and Overwhelm

Individuals with ADHD, autism, and other neurodivergent conditions experience difficulties with the executive function known as “working memory.” 

The failure to perform multiple tasks as a consequence of working memory can result in overwhelm.  

The pain from RSD is so severe and so overwhelming that there’s a tendency to give up trying anything unless there’s a complete guarantee of success. When you’re ruminating on hurt, disappointment, or self-judgment, you may tend to fill your head with all kinds of shoulda, coulda, and woulda’s that deplete your energy and fill up your brain with overwhelm. 

Here's an example from a real-life situation:

Carol’s boss told her that she was being put on probation because she was consistently late for work, and Carol's timeliness and level of detail in her reports needed improvement. Carol was upset, embarrassed, and disappointed in herself that she was not measuring up to the standards of the job and or her goals. She couldn’t focus on her work and lost track of getting things done. Each day became a struggle until she gave up altogether and resigned.  (true name not used) 

Here are five promising ways to crush overwhelm, so you can accomplish what's important to you with more success living with ADHD.   

Shed the Should's 

Shoulds are expectations we have of ourselves or the self-talk we’ve adopted from our interpretation of other people’s expectations of us. Should’s can be limiting ideas or rules we impose on ourselves. 

Quick Tips:

Consider these four questions with the example “I should be more competent.”  

• What about the idea that you should be more competent is true? 
• When you consider the idea that you should be more competent, what do you know that is absolutely true? 
• What's it like for you when you have this thought that you should be more competent? 
• What would you be like if you didn't have the thought that you should be more competent? 
(Based on "The Work," by Byron Katie.)

Prioritize

When you live with ADHD and executive functioning challenges, it can be overwhelming to prioritize the number of multiple tasks. The complexity of deciding what to do when, and in what order can be overwhelming.

Quick Tips:

• Align with your values Think about what you stand for. Set your goals so that your goals align with what you most value. You will find your actions will support what you most value. 
• Break Tasks Into Smaller Steps. Focus on one step at a time.

Plan

Plan a Structured Routine. Planning can reduce overwhelm and remove decision-making fatigue. The brain uses up energy to make decisions. Planning time needs to be separated from action time to perform the task. 

Quick Tips:

• Create a Structured Routine in advance. Establishing a consistent daily routine for getting things done. Set aside a daily planning time so you can efficiently use the time set aside to then get the task done. 
• Use Visual Aids: Visual aids such as calendars, to-do lists, and reminders can be helpful in keeping track of tasks and deadlines.
• To-Do Lists: The to-do list tells you what you are going to do. Categorize Tasks, Projects, Ideas; or Must Do’s, Next Week, Wish List. 
• Use a Calendar: The calendar tells you when you will do your task. Be specific. Use actions. “Write an outline with 5 steps - 45 minutes.” 
• Use Reminders: Set an alarm or timer.

Limit Distractions

Distractions can inadvertently be used to avoid tasks and in the long run, create “mind noise” and overwhelm. 

Quick Tips:

• Create an environment that supports your task, chore, or project. For example, use your desk for computer work or paying bills, your chair for reading, your couch for relaxing with your phone, etc.  
• Consider noise-canceling headphones at work.
• Set aside time for social media. Permit yourself to use social media at specific times of day to avoid “doomscrolling.” 
• Set boundaries with email. Set aside time for checking and responding to email, to avoid getting caught in the weeds of email overwhelm. Never check your email before you are ready for the day. 

Support Yourself

Keeping your cup full will ensure that you focus on what matters with intention and calm. 

Quick Tips:

• Take deep breaths. Take a few deep breaths and let them flow throughout your body. Breathe out the stress.
• Exercise regularly. Regular physical activity can improve focus and increase calm.  
• Practice Meditation and mindfulness. Focusing on the breath and mindfulness techniques can increase relaxation and reduce overwhelm. Movement medication can be particularly helpful when you live with ADHD. 
• Ask for Help. Asking for help is a sign of strength that you're taking care of yourself. It's ok to seek out family and friends or professional support to reduce the overwhelm and take care of your needs. 

To sum up, when you live with ADHD, autism, and other neurodivergent conditions, it’s common to consistently experience in your daily life. 

To crush overwhelm so you can more calmly achieve more success:

Shed the Shoulds

Prioritize

Press Pause

Plan

Limit Physical Distractions

Support Yourself

Warmly,

PS. Need support crushing overwhelm? 

Contact me for an ADHD Strategy Assessment and we’ll set up a plan so you can start problem-solving with more peace and calm!

Transforming Parents Lives