ADHD Coach vs. Therapy: How to Secure the Right Support
Living with ADHD can feel overwhelming, especially when you’re constantly navigating a world that wasn’t designed for your brain. But you don’t have to figure it all out alone. The right support, whether it’s an ADHD coach, therapist, or other professional, can make a huge difference in helping you create systems that work for your brain.
The key is finding someone who understands and respects how your brain works, rather than trying to “fix” you.
Why ADHD-Specific Support Matters?
Many people with ADHD have had negative experiences with traditional therapy, coaching, or workplace evaluations where they were told to “just try harder,” “be more disciplined,” or “follow the rules.” 
ADHD isn’t about a lack of effort; it’s about having a different way of operating.
Neurodiversity-affirming coaches and professionals recognize that ADHD is not a problem to be solved, but a difference to be supported. Instead of pushing neurotypical strategies that don’t work for your brain, neurodiversity-affirming professionals help you:
• Identify your strengths and build on them
• Create personalized tools that fit your way of thinking
• Develop self-compassion instead of self-criticism
• Find practical strategies that work with your brain, not against it
Here are three ways to secure the right support when you live with ADHD and neurodiversity.
Pinpoint the Difference between ADHD Coaching and Therapy
I'm often asked, “Do I need an ADHD coach or a therapist?” The answer depends on what you’re looking for.
ADHD Coaching focuses on practical strategies and accountability. Coaches help you:
• Develop tools for time management, organization, and focus
• Break down big tasks into manageable steps
• Find motivation and momentum
• Navigate work, school, and relationships more effectively
• Learn how to advocate for your needs
Coaching focuses on addressing your current challenges and creating practical steps that help you move forward. It’s not about diagnosing conditions or delving into deep emotional wounds.
An ADHD coach supports you in managing your emotions and developing self-regulation skills, enabling you to pursue your goals more effectively. Coaching can also help you work through feelings of shame, guilt, or self-criticism that often come with living with ADHD.
It’s also important to recognize the emotional weight that often accompanies everyday tasks. You might procrastinate because you're unsure where to start, what to do next, or how to prioritize your tasks. Or you may avoid tasks simply because they feel tedious and uninteresting. A coach can help you navigate these emotional blocks, facilitating your capacity to take action.
And yes—it’s not only okay but beneficial to share how you feel with your ADHD coach. You don’t have to reserve emotions solely for therapy. The difference is in how emotional challenges are addressed: coaching focuses on emotional patterns that affect day-to-day functioning, while therapy goes deeper into healing past wounds and diagnosing mental health conditions.
Therapy focuses on deep emotional challenges, trauma, and mental health. A therapist can help if you’re:
• Struggling with anxiety, depression, or other mental health challenges
• Processing past experiences that impact your self-worth
• Managing trauma or significant life stressors
• Deep shame, guilt, or self-criticism related to or not related to ADHD
For many individuals, a combination of coaching and therapy can be the most effective approach. Coaching helps with the present and future, while therapy addresses significant life stress, mental health challenges, and past experiences that could be holding you back.
Identify the Right Coach or Therapist
Not all professionals understand ADHD or take a neurodiversity-affirming approach. Here’s how to find someone who truly supports you:
They Recognize ADHD as a Difference, Not a Disorder
A good coach or therapist will help you work with your brain, rather than trying to change it. They validate your experiences and focus on strengths-based strategies.
-> Red Flag: If they frame ADHD as a “behavioral problem” or push neurotypical solutions without adapting them to what fits best for you, they may not be the right fit.
They Tailor Strategies to Your Needs
One-size-fits-all solutions don’t work for ADHD brains. A great coach or therapist takes the time to understand your specific challenges and helps you experiment with different tools until you find what works.
-> Red Flag: If they insist that a single approach (such as using a planner) will work and don’t adjust when it doesn’t, they may not be ADHD-informed.
They Help You Build Self-Compassion
Many ADHDers struggle with self-doubt, perfectionism, and feeling “not good enough.” Your support system should empower you, not shame you.
-> Red Flag: If they make you feel like your struggles are due to a “lack of willpower” or “not trying hard enough,” walk away.
They Understand the Impact on Emotions on ADHD
ADHD isn’t just about focus—it also affects emotional regulation. You need someone who acknowledges this and helps you develop tools to manage frustration, overwhelm, and rejection-sensitivity.
-> Red Flag: If they dismiss your emotions or don’t address emotional regulation as part of ADHD, they may not be a good fit.
They Respect Your Autonomy and Unique Brain
You are the expert on your own life. A good professional will listen to your experiences, collaborate with you, and empower you to make decisions about what works best.
-> Red Flag: If they take a rigid, top-down approach, driving their agenda, and don’t involve you in the process, they may not be a great match.
Advocate for Yourself in Coaching or Therapy
Even with the right support, it’s important to advocate for your needs. Here are some ways to make sure your coaching or therapy experience is effective:
• Be honest about what’s working and what’s not. If a strategy doesn’t fit, say so! A good professional will adjust.
• Ask questions. How do they approach ADHD? How do they handle executive functioning challenges?
• Set clear goals. What do you want to get out of coaching or therapy? Communicating your needs helps ensure you’re getting the right kind of support.
• Trust your gut. If something doesn’t feel right, you’re allowed to switch professionals. You deserve a support system that truly understands and respects your brain.
You Deserve Support That Works for You
Finding the right coach or therapist can make a huge difference in your life, helping you shift from struggling to surviving to learning how to thrive. You don’t need to do this alone. There are professionals who understand, respect, and can help you empower your unique brain.
What’s Next?
In the next post, I'll dive into how to advocate for yourself in the workplace, school, and relationships, and how to communicate your needs without guilt or shame.
Until then, remember: You are not the problem. You just need the right kind of support to unlock your full potential.
For more information on the differences between ADHD Coaching and Therapy, please refer to a previous blog article here.
If you're trying to decide on your readiness for Coaching, take this Quiz, "Are You Ready for Coaching?"
Warmly,
PS. Do you need some assistance working with your unique brain?
Contact me for an ADHD Strategy Assessment, and we can discuss the steps you can take now.